Laugh out Loud!

One of my favorvite radio shows is "Car Talk" on NPR...and I have to share this story I heard this morning! So, this was a work assignment in an english class to create a tandem story. The instructions were as follows:

Each person will pair off with the person sitting to his or her immediate right. One of you will then write the first paragraph of a short story. The partner will read the first paragraph and then add another paragraph to the story. The first person will then add a third paragraph, and so on back and forth. Remember to reread what has been written each time in order to keep the story coherent. The story is over when both agree a conclusion has been reached.

First person:
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At first, Laurie couldn't decide which kind of tea she wanted. The chamomile, which used to be her favorite for lazy evenings at home, now reminded her too much of Carl, who once said, in happier times, that he liked chamomile. But she felt she must now, at all costs, keep her mind off Carl. His possessiveness was suffocating, and if she thought about him too much her asthma started acting up again. So chamomile was out of the question.

Second Person
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Meanwhile, Advance Sergeant Carl Harris, leader of the attack squadron now in orbit over Skylon 4, had more important things to think about than the neuroses of an air-headed asthmatic bimbo named Laurie with whom he had spent one sweaty night over a year ago. "AS Harris to Geostation 17," he said into his transgalactic communicator. "Polar orbit established. No sign of resistance so far..." But before he could sign off a bluish particle beam flashed out of nowhere and blasted a hole through his ship's cargo bay. The jolt from the direct hit sent him flying out of his seat and across the cockpit.


First person
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He bumped his head and died almost immediately, but not before he felt one last pang of regret for psychically brutalizing the one woman who had ever had feelings for him. Soon afterwards, Earth stopped its pointless hostilities toward the peaceful farmers of Skylon 4.

"Congress Passes Law Permanently Abolishing War and Space Travel," Laurie read in her newspaper one morning. The news simultaneously excited her and bored her. She stared out the window, dreaming of her youth--when the days had passed unhurriedly and carefree, with no newspapers to read, no television to distract her from her sense of innocent wonder at all the beautiful things around her. "Why must one lose one's innocence to become a woman?" she pondered wistfully.

Second person
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Little did she know, but she had less than 10 seconds to live. Thousands of miles above the city, the Anu'udrian mothership launched the first of its lithium fusion missiles. The dim-witted wimpy peaceniks who pushed the Unilateral Aerospace Disarmament Treaty through Congress had left Earth a defenseless target for the hostile alien empires who were determined to destroy the human race. Within two hours after the passage of the treaty the Anu'udrian ships were on course for Earth, carrying enough firepower to pulverize the entire planet. With no one to stop them they swiftly initiated their diabolical plan. The lithium fusion missile entered the atmosphere unimpeded. The president, in his top-secret mobile submarine headquarters on the ocean floor off the coast of Guam, felt the inconceivably massive explosion which vaporized Laurie and 85 million other Americans. The president slammed his fist on the conference table. "We can't allow this! I'm going to veto that treaty! Let's blow 'em out of the sky!"


I thought this to be so funny I had to share...
Credits go to: www.cartalk.com/content/read-on/1997/03-22-97-2.html

What the hell man..

Today, the insurance commissioner called my surgeon about my letter. They said that Group Health would not talk to them without my permission, due to patient privacy policies. I know I am up for a battle with them and it just make me think about the last 20 years where I have been told over and over that I needed this to be done - but every health insurance plan I have ever had has always excluded this surgery from coverage.

It's frustrating for me, to go through this process again and thinking of the "would of/could of" scenarios of the past. I've been here before (20 years ago) and was unable to get to the final end, because of lack of money an lack of support. I am disappointed because of all the obstacles this surgery has, I could not take care of this when I was younger. Then I begin to think of everything I still have to go through and my confidence waivers. Can I really do this? Can I really recover as well as they say I can? I should have done it 20 years ago - does that mean I won't recover as well as I would have then? Does that mean it's too late - or does that mean I THANK GOD I am finally able to make it happen?

UHG, all that being said, I have been not been feeling too well, I'm scared, I'm worried, and my stomach hurts. Then I get scared again...and then a little more worried...kind of a pattern here as you can see!

I was reading the trials and tribulation on Stephanie's blog about her challenges and I so appreciate you sharing with me your experience and ultimately your success...it gives me hope that there is light at the end of the tunnel.

Got my Grump On!

So, I have had this week off and made a goal to write a appeal/letter to the Insurance Company and Insurance Commissioner. So, I did! Speaking with the Oral Surgeon folks yesterday they gave me some inspiration to take a run at them. So this morning, after doing a few other chores, I sat down and got my "grump" on! I pulled out the insurance contract and began to dissecting the coverage claimed in the contract. To me, it seems very clear that they should cover some of the hospital stay. Although, it is very clear that they will only cover a whopping $1,000 for the orthognathic surgery part...but it states in the same coverage that related hospital stay is covered. I am sure that they will claim that both surgery and hospital coverage is only $1,000 but that is why I sent a copy to the insurance commissioner! Having the insurance commissioner in the mix will provide an advocate for me to keep the insurance companies honest! To me, it seems to be bad faith to say you will cover related hospital services and only cover $1,000. I can't think of any hospital service that would be less than that! We will see, wish me luck!

Summer Time, I think

Not much to say about my teeth, the braces and the process today, except wax is still my friend and flossing is more than just a job - it now is an entire process and procedure that has its own time slot. I keep showing my wife my teeth, and she agrees that it is visually apparent that they have straightened.

On another subject, it seems we are experiencing a bi-polar summer...It rained, and then rained just a little more, then the sun arrived! Temps got almost to 100, so I was summoned to water the garden before everything withered away. While I was working in the yard I got to laughing about the stupid tugging match I always get in with the garden hose. I am always amazed how garden hoses always manage to get tangled and snaked into the weirdest ways. It is almost as if they are alive and their sole purpose is to wait until I am over heated, bent over and exhausted and then...BAM! springs into action, grabbing every rock, pole, weed and refusing to work with me at all. Today, at noon the tempature is trying to get to 60 after raining (again) all night! Wierd

Gratitude

I am so grateful by all the blogs I am following, and their amazing posts through the surgery experience. I think it is awesome to read the journals and see that I am, clearly, not all alone in this problem. Although, I got to admit, when I read other’s journals of the surgery process, I future trip myself into that same experience that they are going through and begin the get scared, and then inspired, and then scared…and so on. The most comforting part is knowing that this surgery happens a LOT, and seems to be very common, and most important survivable! That being said – I don’t know why most insurance companies exclude this from coverage (actually now saying it I do they are cheap). Anyways, screw insurance companies – they suck…unless they help you then they are GREAT!

As for me in my progress…I am just on the flight path to the surgery room. I have had the second wire change to my braces, no big deal…discomfort every now and then. Although, the one thing that I keep thinking of when discomfort comes up is how grateful I am to even proceed forward with this process. It makes my psyche feel comforted that I am improving my health. Everyday, my teeth shift a little and I can begin to use different teeth to chew which is a great feeling. Just yesterday, Pattie and I were at the nursery and they had fresh cantaloupe samples and I took a sample, then bit into it and could almost see myself biting all the way thru it. Soon that will be the case it’s hard to believe, and sometimes I even feel it will never happen but, this stupid bite will go bye bye!

Thank you all!